Monday, August 23, 2010

It was epic

Well not the tennis. The tennis match yesterday between Sam Martin Jr. and myself will not be replayed on any highlight show. First off there was Sam's really strange Tears for Fears classic blasting on his car stereo as he approached the courts. And then there was my game that resembled a groupie at one of those late 1980's concerts. Yes, Sam beat me in biblical proportions. Well technically I was ahead 5-3 and serving for game when my abilities capitulated in biblical proportions, like Lot's wife my game turned to salt. I went from a crisp fresh apple to some deep fried Burger King french fries. The final, 6-5. Sam with the monumental comeback and Jon looking to borrow Sam's classic Tears for Fears CD. I think Everyone does want to rule the world.

So today I am closer to working again. September 1st. I will be playing Earth, Wind, and Fires "September" driving to work my first day, that I guarantee. For the remainder of my time off I'm going to complete all the pre-hire material they keep emailing me every five minutes. I think this company knows more about me than I do. They may already be keeping tabs on my blog so from here forward it shall be known only as "The company thou shall not talk of". It's kind of like those creatures in the Village, but much more frightening. They wear suits and ties and if we've learned anything from the last few years of this economic Chernobyl that is a hell of a lot more impactful than a quick death by some giant hooded rat-like creature.

How was everyone's weekend? Good? This weather..amazing huh? How about that I am working on my corporate small-talk. I'm a little rusty. So where were we? Tennis? I think I finished that topic. Job? Plenty of time to talk about "The company thou shall not talk of", so what next? Ah..politics. Of course. I've managed to steer clear of the old politics for fear of alienating my sole reader on here. Not really sure which way they sway politically, but it's high time we made a stand and shook up the views of the common man. About that mosque?...Um yeah, about that. I uh, just find it hard to approve your permit on the condition that hard-core disciples of your religion, um sort of flew two planes into these buildings down the street about ten years ago. Yeah, um, not really sure I can approve this based on the fact that you have taken so many lives and your religion is not the peaceful establishment you claim to be. I don't know about you but if I left a job and threw my computer out a window and punched my boss in the face walking out the door I somehow am not sure they would hire me back...even ten years later! I'm all about forgiveness but take your forgiveness to another part of town and don't put it on your resume that you did that. Because I sure won't get hired and they should not be putting a mosque there. To me, this doesn't feel like a right or left issue, it feels like common courtesy.

Ok, the politics portion is out of the way. How about sex? Good? Yeah? Ok well I don't really have anything to talk about sex-wise. I just wanted to veer to that direction because you know it's a nice topic. On Entourage, Vinny Chase's girlfriend is a porn star. I guess Speidi is coming out with some new sex tapes and it appears all staged. Man, Hollywood ain't what it used to be. You used to have to hide all of your sexual appetites from the public now you can't catch a break unless you let it out. "I like your reel Stacy, great head shots..but where is your "real" reel??" She'll be hosting the Emmy's in two years.

I don't have too much more today. I have to fill out some forms again. I think fifteen more have hit my inbox since I've started this blog. Just wanted to emphasize the fun I had yesterday in my tennis beatdown. Also that the mosque is not a good idea to me, and I think that without love and a promise land, we're fools to the rules of a government plan, so kick out the style, bring back the jam!

No comments:

Post a Comment